


Vermin

by smolbunprincess



Series: Wires [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Corrupted Steven Universe, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Nightmares, Peridot tried, Steven tried to go outside, i could not figure out how to continue this, it didnt go well, mean tourists, the next instalment will have more comfort for steven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:01:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22406137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolbunprincess/pseuds/smolbunprincess
Summary: Why was he so ugly?
Series: Wires [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606633
Comments: 4
Kudos: 126





	Vermin

"Don't touch that thing, David!"

It was a response that continued playing in his mind over and over again. An endless record that continuously broke him down. He just wanted to go outside, he just wanted to make them happy.. They wanted him to go out, and Steven wanted to as well.

He went to Funland, he covered himself but the wind was too strong and snatched it away. Steven was exposed, his corruption visible for the whole world to see.

He shouldn't have gone out by himself, he shouldn't have gone outside by himself. Shouldn't have gone to Funland, even though Funland was supposed to be fun but he didn't have fun! Steven just wanted everything to go back to normal! It was early! He didn't think there would be many people there! Especially not little kids!

From what he'd been told, no-one minded the gems whose bodies were far from normal. They were accepted, children didn't seem too scared of them.

Though a little creeping voice told Steven that the gems didn't want to tell him the whole truth.

Curling up, Steven pulled the blanket over his body more. He's able to hide under the blanket, not wanting anyone to see his ugliness. Maybe he still looked too human, maybe he was still too scary. Too disgusting.

Vile, repulsive. Why did they want him? Why did his family continue to try to take care of him.

"You're not a monster." They'd say.

"They don't understand."

Harmless, they insisted. They forgot how he launched himself at Amethyst when his agony became too much.

Gentle, they remind him. They neglected the fact his massive paws left deep claw marks that filled with water like man-made rivers.

Kind, they assured. His roar shattered all panes of glass within Beach City, and a kilometre from beyond. The earth trembled beneath his wrath, breaking apart from his anger.

Steven sniffled, curling more into a ball. His gem groaned in mild agony, unable to summon anything to protect himself from himself. His claws dug into his arms, forcing them to bleed. He let out a quiet groan, the pain pulsing around the injuries.

The door slammed downstairs, and heard someone shout. He raised his head slowly, straining to hear whoever it was that entered the house. He lay back down, squeezing his eyes shut as there was the frantic sound of someone sprinting up the stairs.

"Steven! I have arrived to stay with you today!"

Peridot.

She entered his room, tapping away at something. Steven presumed that it was her tablet, it warmed him that he continued to use the item.

"Steven, are you unwell? You are hiding under the blanket, are the lights too bright for your sensitive vision spheres?" There is another sound, the curtain has now been drawn. "The room is now less bright! You are free to exit."

Steven just shut his eyes, his tail swishing slightly. He just wanted to go to bed now, he didn't want to deal with anything.

"Have you consumed organic matter today? You are required to consume matter so that your energy levels remain in their optimal level." She is by his bed now, or she's still shouting. Steven cannot tell. "I am removing the blanket so that we can communicate face to face."

It is a little surprising admittedly, neither Peridot, Lapis, or Bismuth liked to look at him. This was a new development, which quickly was dispersed as Peridot easily pulled the blanket off of him. He tensed and gasped as she was able to witness his fear.

"Steven! Steven you are wounded!" She exclaimed, setting her hand over his arm. She quickly hurried away to pull out the medical kit. "Do not worry Steven! I will use these sticky fabric strips to stop the flow!"

As quickly as she disappeared, she reappears. Peridot practically slapped the bandages onto his arms, the band-aids easily covering the injuries that he had sustained. He responds with a huff, a minor thank you and his tail swished.

"Ah, yes. I am to interpret your speech this way." Peridot nodded to herself, looking ta her tablet as she tapped away. "I have discussed with many of the other gems who have been corrupted before on how best to communicate with you. I have devised -"

"I can talk."

Peridot stopped, not presuming her ramble after she had been interrupted. Instead she stared at Steven, eyes wide like ping-pong balls.

"I just.. I don't like doing it." He shifted so she was no longer facing him, curling in on himself to hide as best as he could.

"But why is that? Verbal communication is arguably one of the best kinds of communication. Of course there are many other kinds that are just as beneficial, but this is always how we have communicated. Would you instead like to write down your thoughts, or shall I set up a game of charades? Between you and me, I am far more superior at the game than Lapis."

Steven just curled his limbs closer to his body.

"What is it that you want to do Steven? I can show you charts of the progress of individual gems from the school?" Peridot suggested, stepping a little closer. Something clicked in his mind, his despair pushing corrupted instincts to the forefront.

Steven growled at Peridot, baring his fangs as she stepped a little too close into his radius. She quickly stumbled back, looking absolutely petrified and Steven wished the ground would just swallow him up already.

"Ah, yes yes! My sincerest apologies Steven! I should have remembered, Connie said you were only starting to get used to people being close! Applying aid to your injuries must have stepped over it!"

It might have, his thoughts had been a mere buzz in his mind at that stage. He found he couldn't really comment on it.

But he doesn't want them to touch him, he is hideous. He fears that this strain of corruption is contagious, and they can catch it from being too close to him. Even Connie could get sick, and it might be impossible to heal her.

Steven responds with a saddened warble.

"I'll stay downstairs Steven, I will ensure your care is optimal in that position!" As far away as possible. "Shout if you need assistance."

She scampered off, he fell asleep at some point. He doesn't know when.

He doesn't like to sleep. He doesn't like to dream.

Nightmares are plucked like apples in an orchard, thrown in his path and he becomes the mere insect crushed by a falling fruit. They are nonsensical but making sense all the same, shattered fragmentation of what he should be are all around him and he tries to attach the pieces to himself but none fit.

He's broken them too much, they can never fit.

In some kinds of nightmares, Steven only sees himself. He sees the monster, he sees the absolute abomination he had - always been? Never right, never should have existed. An ugly, disgusting, disgraceful hybrid.

He sees his teeth grow, his body change and contort into something even more shameful. His bones break and click and grow, bending into shapes that they never should have been. He bled, he cried but nothing could hear him. Blood leaked like an overflowing faucet, his eyes are disorientated and disgusting. He reaches to grab at himself, to pull and tear and strip away every little imperfection.

He is not good! He is ugly! Disgusting! Disgusting!

His claws clasp on the abominations face, pulling and pulling until he fell back with a roar. Everything shattered, everything falls to pieces and Steven is there. Laying in a pool of his insecurities, a reminder of the shame he brought to the world thanks to his very existence.

Don't touch it.

Don't touch it.

_**VERMIN.** _

When he finally, really wakes up there is the sound of others murmuring downstairs. A simple chatter of something he didn't want to listen to, its night time. Steven hadn't eaten all day, but when he sees himself in the TV reflection, he knows that is for the better.

Don't feed the beast..

Steven got out of bed, it groaned and his body groaned in protest. He doesn't go far, he yanks a sheet off of his mirror and sat in front of it. He stared, and he stared.

He takes in every little imperfect detail, every little thing that made him a monster. It was everything, his skin is leathery and sharp and wrong. His hands are not kind, they are dangerous and weapons for destruction. They would tear, and tear, and tear until everything was gone.

There's a thumping. Steven doesn't realise that his tail has begun to thump on the ground in his frustration.

He garbled and chattered at his reflection, cursing it in a language that no-one understand. He demeaned it, reduced it to mere depressing scraps through a tongue lashing.

A bowl of cut fruit is placed by his side at one point. He doesn't notice who brought it, doesn't remember when it was placed there.

He doesn't remember eating it either.

"Don't touch, don't touch.." He hisses to himself, dragging his claws down the mirror. "Don't touch. Bad, bad, bad, bad.... Bad. Bad."

He stays there the whole night.


End file.
